Kid food, according to my husband, is anything that could be found on a kids menu. For example, macaroni and cheese, grilled cheese or fish sticks. Dinner has to be meat, starch, vegetable and salad. Everyone knows I hate food to begin with, so this was no easy chore for me. My kids did have their fair share of chicken nuggets and spaghetti o’s. There were many a night where my husband was either working or in school so the quicker I could get dinner on the table, the better. It was about 10 years ago when we moved to Connecticut that we instituted family dinner every week night. Trying to hold off hungry teenage boys after swim or football practice wasn’t easy, but somehow I managed to make it all happen.
I was lucky enough to land a part time job that allowed me to be home in the afternoon for the children. I ran around to doctor and orthodontic appointments, getting supplies for school projects, helping with school projects. Because my husband woke up each morning and thought about what he wanted for dinner, he would pull something out of the freezer and leave me instructions. That worked for a while, mindlessly preparing a dinner for him but not for me or the kids. Maybe we didn’t want what he picked out. I started collecting cook books, trying out new things. For the most part, there weren’t too many disasters, although I have been hailed the Queen of Boiled Meat. And I am sorry, I grew up eating my Great Grandmother’s bean and hot dog soup and it is delicious. I think that was the night my husband took a taste and threw the rest in the trash and went out to eat by himself.
One afternoon, instead of making what was instructed, I decided to make tacos instead. We hadn’t had those for a good long while. The kids were excited to help me pick out all the toppings and side dishes. It was one of the few times all four of us worked together to prepare dinner. We were singing and dancing around the kitchen setting the table, chopping lettuce, grating cheese. Then it was the classic record player scratch noise, we all came to a screeching halt. Dad was standing in the doorway staring with his mouth open in horror at the scene in front of him. What? I asked timidly, What’s the matter? It took a few moments for my husband to reply TACOS? TACOS FOR DINNER? THAT’S KID FOOD! The kids and I slowly turned out heads to look at each other, for a brief moment the silence was deafening. Then like a flip of the switch we all started laughing, the kind where you have lots of tears and sore abs the next day. I don’t remember if my husband ate with us that night, I think he did. He might have had leftovers from the night before, God forbid he eat a taco. That night I realized that our family dinner nights weren’t all about the food, it’s who we are with that is the most important. The kids and I would not have had all that fun together if I had been cooking one of his scripted meals. After that incident, we all began to look forward to meal time. There were many dark nights of brooding teenagers full of angst, but also many bright nights full of laughter. Some nights we all had so much to say to each other, unless you were holding the salad dressing bottle, you could not speak.
Fast forward 10 years and we are almost empty nesters. My daughter has moved out and the two boys are away at college. We have settled into a pretty simple routine. Monday night I am out of the house so he has dinner on his own, Wednesday night my husband dines with his business partners and I have only child dinner night at my parents and Thursday night we go out to dinner together. Tuesday night has become my evening to make dinner and he cooks on the week-ends if we aren’t out with friends or family. Recently we took out our counter tops in preparation for new granite counters. My husband had to unhook the dishwasher and take out the sink as well. Wow, no cooking going on in this kitchen for at least two weeks, that’ll be tough I said to my husband. He looked at me and said, this will be such a hardship, you won’t be able to make dinner two whole times.
Last night was the first of my two nights of making dinner. I stopped at Whole Foods and bought already prepared salmon, roasted beets and salad. My husband made it home before I did so there was no trickery to be had. I was going to tell him I made everything in tin-foil for easy clean up. As I was getting out the paper plates and plastic cutlery, he looked over the paper tub and plastic containers of food asked if there was anything he could do to help. He took about six steps into the family room and then I announced dinner was ready. We had a good laugh while eating, making fun of all the “hard work” I had put into the meal. After we ate, he volunteered to do the dishes. Such a nice guy.
I am hoping, truly hoping, that our counters will be in soon. I have both boys coming home from school next week end. One on his spring break and the other to have his wisdom teeth removed. It’s one thing to eat out or bring food in when there are only the two of us, but for them, I really need to have a working kitchen. My post surgery boy will need soups and comfort foods to make him feel better, and the other one, well, he just likes to eat all the time. The outlook is good for taco night and dancing in the kitchen. We will just have to make sure Dad won’t be home for dinner…………..
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